My absolute favorite baby item I received was a sling. I had to learn to use it-- and it's a little awkward with a newborn as they get lost in the folds a bit. But after learning, I used it constantly. I still do, and my girls are 5 and 3 yrs old (not too much, but on our last trip, I used it to tote the 3 yr old all over Chicago so I wouldn't have to use a stroller.) As babies, both girls would be soothed to sleep in the sling. I could lay them down when they were a bit older, and use the sling as a blanket. When I was out, it kept strangers from touching them as easily, and I could nurse while walking through the mall without anyone noticing. I hardly ever had to carry the car seat, and I NEVER used the fancy car seat/stroller combo that I was given. My husband used it, too, when they were very young.

My girls are almost adults now but the piece of equipment that was my biggest help and gave me tremendous happiness was the baby carrying backpack my husband bought me. We started with a sling when our first daughter was born and I loved it. But after our second daughter grew to be a fair size I needed something that allowed me to run quickly with two free hands to manage our hyperactive older daughter's adventures.

Having a youngster a few inches from your face is an intense joy. I often felt like a happy beast of burden as she directed me over to trees or groceries or people that she wanted to see from a closer position. It was an easy interaction while freeing my hands to cook or to squat and mother an older child.

Find one that supports off the hips with good bindings and padding as if you were going backpacking in the mountains with gear. I lived in mine for years as we had three daughters in all and it is still in great shape so it is worth shopping for the best.

I'm due in November, and so far one of the nicest natural gifts I've been given is an organic moses basket from my sister-in-law. I think the best gifts are those you might not get yourself (particularly if, like us, you're trying to save money). We wouldn't have splurged on a moses basket because we'd definitely survive just putting the baby in the car seat on the floor. But this way we can let the baby sleep in the moses basket in the crib so she/he will be getting used to his/her future bed from within the comfy organic womb of the all natural basket. And we can bring the baby from room to room with us in the early weeks and months and know that not only won't he/she roll away, but she'll also be safe from all the nasty chemicals found in synthetic materials.

I just wrote a book with Lexy Zissu called The Complete Organic Pregnancy and although we cover a variety of organic topics, I was probably most convinced about how important it is to avoid the flame retardants that come on mattresses in this country. We spend a lot of time sleeping, and babies spend even more, so if you're registering for a baby shower try to include an organic crib mattress.

COMMENT FROM DEBRA: Moses baskets are baby-sized baskets handwoven from palm leaves, often filled with little mattress pads, sheets, and ruffles. There's an organic moses basket on Debra's List at Organic Cotton Alternatives, and www.mosesbaskets.com/ has a simple and very affordable moses basket for only $19.95 (they also have a wooden rocking stand). Just type "moses basket" into your favorite search engine and you will find many other decorated baskets, which can range up to $300-$400.

Here's a few of my favorites.

Any of the Weleda baby products are awesome, they're biodynamic. We still use they're diaper cream for various rashes, it's great on Mommies hands and feet also.

Hanna Andersson organic cotton pajamas are gorgeous, they just get softer and softer and there's almost always some on their sale page.

And the most important thing I learned from experience was if your baby is suffering from colic (knees pulled up to the chest screaming from approx. 4P till 6P) give up wheat and dairy immediately. I did and my son was completely cured by the next day. To this day my son is still repulsed by milk products. No problem with wheat.

I agree with the sling also. It takes some practice at first, but most moms wonder how they ever lived without it. Another great gift would be to pay for a postpartum doula in your area. Here is an article explaining this: What is a Postpartum Doula and What Does She Do?.

DONA and CAPPA are two organizations that certify doulas and you can start by doing a search there.

COMMENT FROM DEBRA: This sounds like a great gift to me. If you aren't familiar with doulas, they basically help the new mother learn how to breastfeed and nurture her in other ways so that she can better nurture the baby. Doulas will also cook and clean and do whatever else needs to be done to make a smooth transition. I imagine this would be wonderful for a first-time mother, especially if she doesn't have other experienced mothers around to help her.

One of my favorite topics! We have seven children ages 23 to 3, and have been through a lot of baby gear (and philosophies and methods).

Like Laurel and Juanita, we have used slings and backpacks to carry our babies. (I enjoyed their comments and how they conveyed the sweetness and joy of raising children.)

We begin using the backpack when our child is four or five months of age, considering physical development and strength. With our third, we invested in a high-quality baby backpack from an outdoor equipment store. The engineering of this pack makes it very comfortable and I have worn even toddlers in it for hours at a time. We rarely used the stroller with the first babies and didn’t even own one for the last few. (How often do you see parents pushing an empty stroller and carrying their child!)

They have all loved the backpack and one benefit is that I know just where they are and what they are doing! (Mischief is still possible: one baby snacked on the succulent leaf of a fortunately-non-toxic sansevieria hanging in a pot in Grandma’s kitchen.)

Even a crib is optional. With our youngest, ours was in storage as we were remodeling and there just wasn’t room for it. All of our babies have slept with us, at least at times, and the recent ones longer. We, too, have used a Moses Basket with each of our babies.

We used to have a baby swing, but got rid of that, and the playpen, too. However, before we had older children to hold the baby, I really did appreciate the playpen because sometimes, Momma does have to set the baby down.

I just asked my husband what else I should mention. He said cloth diapers, breastfeeding and no binkys.

About diapers: I read years ago that the temperature inside a disposable diaper is similar to that of a hothouse, an optimum temperature for the growth of bacteria. This would be true of even a “healthy” paper diaper (which we have used occasionly).

Volumes have been written about the benefits of breastfeeding for both mother and baby. This has been one of the best mothering decisions I ever made. We bought bottles so I could pump and Dad could give Baby a bottle when I was gone. We tried this once or twice with our first child, but she rejected it and was willing to wait for the real thing. I ended up giving the bottles away to a mother who adopted.

Re “binkys” (does anyone even make a “healthy” binky?): if a mother nurses enough, Baby will have no interest in this. We threw those out after baby number two. Another thing to consider regarding the use of pacifiers is explained in Breastfeeding and Natural Child Spacing: How Ecological Breastfeeding Spaces Babies by Sheila Kippley where she describes what she calls ecological breastfeeding. (There’s another product you can chuck: the pharmaceuticals.)

A related item is baby food, which we haven’t purchased for many years. Contrary to common practice, a few of our children ate very little solid food till nearly a year of age. When they can sit up (about six months), they join us at the table. (We have a high chair that is right up at the table, not set apart with a tray.) We begin to offer suitable foods but don’t officially “feed the baby” with foods he has neither the teeth nor the digestive enzymes to handle.

Leah mentions doulas. A doula will also attend a birth, and if I ever had to deliver in a hospital again, I would absolutely have one. A doula is knowledgeable about birth and can intercede on behalf of the mother as a professional. Many among hospital staff are very interventive and do not understand or respect the natural God-designed process of birth.

I absolutely LOVE Earth Mama Angel Baby's Bottom Balm. My daughter had a really bad diaper rash from Antibiotics she had to take for an ear infection when she was about 1, and after putting it on her for a couple of days it was gone! It smells wonderfull and is all natural, with herbs, olive oil, etc. it is the best thing out there for diaper rash- or to prevent them- and you can also use it on scrapes and scratches! I am never without it !

I also used a sling when she was younger, but she is to active now (21 months), but I'm planning on using it next time around.

Regarding "No Binkys", my question is, why? I have a three year old - our last - she is STILL nursing. I think sometimes she'll never stop and I really fear weaning her - she is nothing like our other children who had no major problems weaning. This seems to be her whole life and the thought of being "done" terrifies her. To be honest, it scares me too, because she cannot calm herself. I thought maybe a binky or pacifier would help with the sucking need and help to calm her. Are there any "healthy" or nontoxic pacifiers (binky, nuk, etc) out there?

Thanks!

To J.K. from Helen, I don't have any sure answers that will help your daughter have peace with weaning. But I do have a few thoughts. Certainly, nursing is a very close, comforting thing and perhaps it is that aspect of nursing, and not so much a sucking need, that makes it important to her.

As I gradually wean our children, we substitute other close, cuddly things for nursing. At bedtimes, it was reading books together. In the early morning hours (the last nursing to go with each of our children) we cuddled up close and went back to sleep.

We're in that last phase with our almost-four-year-old, nursing about once a week now. We have talked occasionally over the last few months about the time when he won't nurse anymore because he's getting to be a bigger boy. At first, he seemed very doubtful about that being a good thing, but now he talks comfortably about it. In his mind, it will be "later"; he knows he can nurse again. I think what has usually happened in the past is that we have forgotten to nurse and that's the end of it.

Another related issue is that when our older two were small, I was their play buddy. Now they play with each other, and I get busy with other things and forget to spend time with them. When certain behaviors appear, I am reminded that my child needs some time with Momma. (This is true of the big ones, too!) (And Dad, too, come to think of it...)

Thank you, Helen,
I appreciate it! It is also nice to know there are others out there with an older nurser!
God Bless-
JK

I also loved my sling. For a while it was the only place my son would nap! I used Hotslings brand, but I know there are many natural options in slings.

Here is a correction about the above-mentioned sansevieria (that our baby reached while in a back-pack): it is mildly toxic.

It has a rating of 2,4 in the toxicity classifications. 2 = "Minor Toxicity: "ingestion of these plants may cause minor illnesses such as vomiting or diarrhea. If ingested, call the Poison Control Center or your doctor." 4 relates to dermatitis.

With our big family, we have called the poison center four or five times for plant ingestion. Twice, older children have given baby a flower as a little gift!

We have gotten rid of a number of plants inside and out that were potentially dangerous. The yard guy was incredulous about digging up a beautiful Daphne which grew so large that its plentiful and deadly berries were easily accessible from the lawn and little hands. (This one is even toxic through skin contact with the sap.)

A helpful book has been Common Poisonous Plants and Mushrooms of North America by Nancy J. Turner and Adam F. Szczawinski. It has photos, descriptions of plants, their specific toxins, symptoms of poisoning, and specific medical treatment required.